What's Your Relationship to Surprise?

James Carse says that in a finite game, like chess, being surprised is a sign that you are losing. Since you couldn’t see the move in advance, it means your opponent knows something you don’t.

In an infinite game, such as life, however—where the goal is to keep the game alive, rather than “winning” or concluding—surprise is what you want. Surprise ensures drama, and drama ensures that the game remains alive and exciting.

Since we are at once players of infinite and finite games, we must simultaneously love and fear surprise.

What does your relationship to surprise tell you about whether you see yourself as playing a game to win vs. playing a game to play? Do you try to minimize surprise in your life or expect and welcome it?

Given the inevitability of surprise, should we be more anxious or more light-hearted?